


In Kovit's Perspective

by L_Michelakos



Category: Market of Monsters - Rebecca Schaeffer
Genre: F/M, Spoilers for Only Ashes Remain, Torture
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-06
Updated: 2020-05-21
Packaged: 2021-02-23 13:21:26
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 3
Words: 8,664
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23512162
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/L_Michelakos/pseuds/L_Michelakos
Summary: This is basically a rewrite of Chapter 46 of Only Ashes Remain, the sequel to Not Even Bones, in Kovit's perspective. A lot of stuff's happened, and I really wanted to write it through Kovit's mind to see what he was thinking. I hope you enjoy ^^SPOILERS FOR ONLY ASHES REMAIN, PLEASE DO NOT READ IF YOU WISH NOT TO BE SPOILED!So I originally wanted to just make this a oneshot, but I decided to turn this into a series of oneshots in Kovit's perspective along with writing theoretical scenes in When Villains Rise, so if you saw this title as Chapter 46 - Kovit's Perspective do not be afraid, it is still here XDI should also make sure y'all reading this know that NEB and OAR are not at all mine, the books belong to Rebecca Schaeffer. I've taken some of my favorite scenes and rewritten them into Kovit's perspective (hence the title). If you were looking for pirated books, too bad :P here's a link to the writer's books if you wanna read them https://rebecca-schaeffer.tumblr.com/books
Relationships: Kovit/Nita
Comments: 29
Kudos: 165





	1. OAR Chapter 46

**Author's Note:**

> I will warn you one more time, this will including content from Not Even Bones' sequel book Only Ashes Remain, so if you haven't read it and have no desire to be spoiled, DO NOT READ! Ok thanks, enjoy~! ^^
> 
> And if you're coming from the webtoons, lemme just link you to the books because *they're so good and Rebecca deserves all the support* https://rebecca-schaeffer.tumblr.com/books

_I just killed Henry._

Kovit never thought those string of words in his mind would come together until he was forced to choose; Henry or Nita.

And he chose Nita.

And it was so easy to kill Henry, it was in a blink of an eye.

The person that raised him like a son was dead. He could hear his neck breaking, feel it vibrate up his head almost. Rarely did he kill someone like this, but torturing Henry was never going to be the case.

The blank look in his eyes said it all.

Not a moment sooner, probably even before Henry hit the floor, Kovit heard another body drop to the ground. Nita headbutted the guy with them and crushed his skull in against the wall. Kovit pushed down the shivering, somehow. Maybe because he was still fixated on Henry's limp body.

His head was twisted. If Henry were alive, Kovit would've felt it. He tried to be as quick as possible, take as little pain as he could. The only thing he felt was just a pin hammered into the tree.

"You killed him." Said Gold.

Her.

This fucking bitch.

_May_.

Kovit had to slow himself down to look at her. She had a gun pointed at him, as if that was gonna scare him off. She lied to him, for years. Lied about who she was, made him have a relationship with her and exposed him to Henry in the first place.

She's the one who started this all.

He lunged forward, twisting the gun out of Gold's hands and pinned her hard against the wall. He could hear her head bounce off it, feeling a twitch of pain. He barely cared for it, he couldn't.

"Let me gol!" She screamed, trying to look tough but she was definitely scared and shaking.

"Why? Because you pretended to be my friend for years??" He asked, his restraint starting to fail him.

She suddenly had a hard face. "I didn't pretend! You pretended!"

Said the one who was specifically assigned to keep tabs on _me_ , make me submit under someone's control using my own rules.

"Liar!" Kovit shoved her shoulder back, hard, feeling it pop out of her socket. He felt the pleasure roll down his body, relishing in the pain as guilt also hit him. She screamed in his face, her body shaking from the dislocation. Gold tried to wriggle harder, trying to escape his grasp.

But she was always weaker. Always relied on the sun to burn her vampires, relied on her henchmen if she wanted someone dead, relied on zannies to torture. She was nothing compared to May he knew, absolutely nothing.

The rules didn't matter anymore, they were all burned to the ground the moment he put his hands on Henry. Nothing was left to survive for.

Then, Kovit felt warmth and pressure on his shoulder, accompanied by a voice. "Kovit, stop."

"Why?" He asked, turning his head to face Nita, the last person he wanted in his life. "You don't like the sound of her screams? Or is it just any screams you didn't cause yourself?"

It was pitiful, how much everything in his life just went against him. His mother, Henry, and now Nita. He was always at the edge of the blade, waiting to be cut.

"That's not-" She started, but he didn't want to hear her pathetic excuses.

"You stand there and judge me, but you killed more people in the last week than I've killed in my life!"

She visibly flinched. Good.

Gold tried to kick at Kovit's legs, but she underestimated his torture skills. He easily dislocated his knee, feeling even more of her pain as she screamed harder. Gold's body started to limp down, but his hands found her throat and kept her up against the wall.

She struggled to speak, but Gold still managed to croak out words. "You're nothing but a monster, no matter what you tell yourself." Kovit could feel her tears on his hand, they were racing down her face as if it were a competition. "A real person could never do this to someone they thought of as a friend."

Gold was not his friend. May was, and she was killed right in front of him. It had to be the closest person, essentially his best friend.  
  


"She's not wrong, Kovit." Nita said.

Who asked for your opinion, Nita?

"You don't hurt your friends. Remember? It's a rule."

"What rules?" He asked, now becoming aware of how wet his cheeks were. "I've broken my rules. I just murdered Henry. What does any of it matter anymore?"

Kovit then twisted Gold's body, and this time he allowed the pain to sink into his body, letting himself experience it to its fullest. Maybe as some sick way to remind Nita what he was. Dislocated joints were always something he enjoyed.

Kovit was everything Nita feared, everything she despised and looked down on, to make herself feel better. As if she was any better. As if she could save him now.

He already killed Henry, Kovit was no longer held by the strings he made to keep him here. Nothing mattered anymore, no one would accept him the way he was, rules or none. His existence was just for people to use him.

Even the people he loved.

Suddenly, he was ripped away from Gold, now fully facing Nita as he heard Gold's body hit the floor. "Kovit, look at me." She said.

He didn't, trying to not look at her. Even now, with everything that's happened, he still felt his heart flutter as though a butterfly were stuck in a glass cage.

What a sickening feeling to have.

Of course he was forced to look at her, Nita's hands took hold of his cheeks and made him look. She was always the one in control of this relationship, no matter what. He could feel blood on one of her hands.

"You're hurting," She said, her voice low. No shit, Sherlock. "I get that. And if you need pain, if you need comfort food, I promise you, I can give myself more pain than any other human in the world if that will make you feel better."

Sudden flashes of her pain woke something up inside Kovit. He never liked admitting he fed off her pain, always trying to control his body or when it was used as a signal.

The night of the fire was a big one. Even when she was so far, he could feel the tremendous amount of pain she went through when reawakening her pain circuits.

She would really offer her pain like that? To make him feel better about killing Henry?

Nita continued, Kovit caught the look of worry in her eyes. "But I want to know that you'll be able to look me in the eye afterwards." She was suddenly much closer to his face. "I will do anything for you, Kovit, but you have to promise me it won't break us."

All desires of Nita's pain vanished. He can't promise that.

The habits of his rules were sunken so deep, he could pull himself out to hurt Nita. Kovit can't ever hurt Nita, not even if he wanted to.

He turned his head, the warmth of her hands dropping from his face. "I wouldn't. Be able to look you in the eye, I mean."

"I thought so," She said, breathing in.

Kovit was aware of Gold's attempt at escaping, but he knew she'd never make it out. The pain that she experienced was coursing through him once more, he allowed himself to shiver in the pleasure of it.

Nita's face was close once more. "No matter how broken you think you are, Kovit, you still care about your friends. Hurting Gold will just make you feel awful."

He looked at the ground, swallowing. He can't face this right now. Kovit then turned to Henry's dead body. It was so much harder than he expected, to walk closer to a corpse that he knew forever.

Henry, despite the position he was in, looked oddly peaceful. No expression of pain in his face, no hint of fear. He was just as confident when he was alive.

Slowly, Kovit combed a strand of hair off of Henry's eyes and pushed the eyelids down. Kovit's never done this before, felt so much pain, for someone like this. He's never had to see a loved ones' corpse, he never had to see his mom or Matt's dead body.

Is this what it's like? How could anyone live after this?

He was aware of Nita's offered hand, but he didn't take it, still focusing on Henry as the tears trailed down his face, following the path of its predecessors. "I tried so hard." He started, his voice was tired. "To let myself enjoy who and what I was, to let myself revel in the pain while still keeping myself sane. I drew lines, I made small sandcastle walls to keep out the darkness, to make sure I never became like other zannies I'd met. Like the woman Henry hired."

Like his own mother.

Kovit looked up at Nita, blinking away the tears that blurred his vision. "But it never mattered. Henry didn't want that kind of person. Gold was lying this whole time. Matt is dead. And you..." Oh god, you. Why you?

"You can't stand me. You freak whenever even a hint of what I am surfaces. You can only stand to be near me by ignoring the parts you don't like." His voice broke at that.

Not like it mattered anymore.

He dropped his head, his hair falling forward. "I suppose Henry won. He always wins. I've broken my own rules. I've become exactly what Henry wanted me to be."

"No," Nita started, he could hear her step forward. "That's not true."

I swear to god, Nita. Trying to feign sympathy is harder than it is.

Kovit's gaze shot back up at her. "Don't tell me you're not happy he's dead. That this is over, that he's out of the way."

She can't lie to him, not with that statement. He knew her better than to lie now.

Nita looked straight at him, as if trying to choose the right words to say, as if any wrong thing she says will finalize his demise.

And she was right to feel that way.

Finally, she spoke. "I wouldn't lie to you like that. I _am_ happy it's over. I was scared. For me. For you." She came closer, her voice catching. "But I'm not happy about how it ended. I never wanted you to break your rules. I never wanted to cause you pain."

He stared at her. "You're the one who wanted me to lure him somewhere so we could murder him." Kovit said incredulously.

"Yes," She breathed out. "I was wrong to ask that of you. And wrong to blame you for not being able to go through with it. I'm sorry."

Whoa.

For some reason, he felt much lighter than before. She apologized to him, for once. Someone has actually apologized to him, like a human being. He looked at her in the eyes now, her hazel eyes matching his black ones, and it was full of sincerity.

She couldn't have faked that.

"I made a dumb mistake. I've never... I mean, I haven't really had many friends before." She looked away, as if embarrassed to admit that. "It's hard for me to understand sometimes. That you're your own person, with your own desires and wants that don't always match with mine. And that's ok. I may not be comfortable with some of your choices. I may be scared of them."

He stared at her as she swallowed, probably to compose herself to continue.

"More than scared. I won't lie; the screams... they bother me sometimes. But I can't pick and choose what aspects I want and make a new person for myself. That's not how it works."

She then faced him and held her hands out, cupping his face once more in the palms of her hands. Kovit felt the crevices and smooth parts of her hand, the warmth seeping into his cold face.

"You've picked the path you want. And I will always respect that. It's your path to walk, not mine to criticize." She then laughed, suddenly. It almost made him flinch when she did. "Look at me. I dissect people."

He was always going to remember the disturbing look on her face as she debated on whether or not to dissect him in that fish tank.

"I burned a market full of people alive. I murdered a bunch of strangers in cold blood. I've no place passing judgement."

Her fingers slightly shifted over his skin, feeling his tears. "I'm your friend, Kovit. And I will always support you, whatever you want to be." When she continued, her voice seemed to shake, as though nervous. "I can't promise I won't make mistakes again. I can't promise I won't freak out when you do something that scares me. I'm not perfect. But I can promise I'll always try, and I'll always be on your side."

Everything she's said... "Nita-"

Her finger was over his lips, and he had to shut up. "One more thing. For what it's worth, I don't think you broke your rules here. Henry betrayed you. He wasn't your friend anymore. He wasn't even really the man you thought you knew." And she slid her finger to his chin, leaving him to feel the presence of warmth dissipate on his lips and skin.

"You had to make a choice, and one of us was going to die. He'd tortured and murdered your best friend, and threatened to do worse. If ever there was a reason to bend a rule, that would be it. Forgive yourself, Kovit." She said, keeping her eyes on him. "It's human to care about the wrong people. Forgive yourself for making a mistake and being cornered into a desperate choice."

Her finger continued down his chin, and he just focused on her as the last of his tears were being squeezed out.

Nita was being entirely fair in this. Never did he feel this reassured with honesty, felt so much trust, then right now. Nita was really all he had left, and she was the final thing keeping him here, the one who reattached the strings he tried to cut away from.

He needed her, and she needed him.

Blinking, he felt Gold's pain once more, was he that distracted from her? "Thank you." He said, breathing it out. Kovit looked back at the door and felt her going down the stairwell, shivering. It felt weirdly inappropriate, to let himself feel the pleasure of her pain as guilt resurfaced.

"And thank you for stopping me before I really did break myself." He said, looking back to her.

"Always," She said, leaning forward. For a moment, he thought she was going to kiss him, but that wasn't the case. Nita pressed her forehead against his as she said the words that sealed their fate. "I won't let you break."

He breathed in, feeling her warmth intensify his, leaning against her as well, their noses close to contact. He could feel her heart beating hard, their lips just inches apart.

And Nita closed that distance.

He felt her warm and soft lips against his, sensations he was feeling were almost equivalent when he reveled in pain. His chin by itself was as if fireworks were set off, sending the same signals to the rest of his body.

Then it was blatantly obvious how close their bodies were when Nita kissed him, moving in to press against him. He was able to feel her curves, her chest was beating almost as wildly as his.

He parted his lips for her, moving with her as his arms wrapped around her back, crushing her against him to feel her more, her thumbs still wiping away the wet streaks that his tears left behind.

Kovit felt Nita swallow as she pulled away, and his lips were cold as they tried to recreate the feeling on her lips against his.

He couldn't help it, he stared at her in utter shock. This beautiful, psychotic, amazing, murderous, genius of a girl just kissed him.

Nita cleared her throat as she looked away, her face flushed in embarrassment.

He wanted to do that again.

Kovit lifted one of his hands off of her back and placed it under her chin, directing it back to his face. He then observed her, looking at her eyes, blushing cheeks and lips. Mostly at her lips, if he had to confess, they were slightly parted as he held her chin.

Did she feel this too? Her nerves must be jumping in place.

He then leaned in, pressing his forehead against hers once more, feeling as though lava hit him, wanting to say so much more but he could only breathe out one word. "Nita."

She breathed in harshly, as though a sharp pain suddenly struck her. Suddenly, Gold's pain registered again, and he was going to go against kissing her again, but he needed to feel her lips again.

Right as Gold sent a shiver down his body, he leaned in a kiss Nita, meeting Nirvana.

He's wanted to do this for some time now, ever since they first landed in Brazil. Of course that didn't happen because he was a coward and just gave her his email address, what person just hands that out?

In honesty, he never thought he'd see her again. At least so soon, but with everything crumbling beneath him, Nita was the last piece of driftwood he could find in the sea of monsters.

He knew he was a monster. Kovit will never forget such a blatant fact. But for once, and truly, he felt like a human.

And even more, he felt like a man as he kissed Nita, holding her as if he was going to be murdered by INHUP tomorrow.

No matter what happened now, he can die knowing he finally had his first kiss with a girl he's seemingly fallen for in the course of a short month. A girl that might not accept everything about him yet, but is willing to just to be with him.

Never again would he willing choose someone else over Nita, yet another rule he set, and another rule he'll never allow himself to break.


	2. WVR Morning Shock

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> So hiiiiiiiiii, I realize this is pretty late, but this was a hard chapter to write XD and you'll soon see why, enjoyyyyyy~

Kovit unabashedly enjoyed himself as he tortured Fabricio. He took his time, hearing the music of Fabricio's screams as he absorbed his pain.

With everything that happened today, he definitely deserved a hearty meal.

As he dislocated a few of Fabricio's fingers, Kovit began to think more about Nita. At least, pertaining to Nita. INHUP sold her location. What were they trying to accomplish? Could this be somehow related to the vampire who killed her dad?

Jeez, among all of this, he somehow forgot Nita's dad is dead. What friend - boyfriend - something?? - someone who's very close to someone - forgets about that detail?

Maybe he shouldn't think about this, it'll spoil his food.

Instead, he thought about Nita, solely on her. What was that kiss? Did this mean they were much more than friends? Normally you don't make out with your friends, but maybe some things were an exception? How the fuck was he gonna figure this out?

He's not gonna lie, he  _ really  _ enjoyed himself. And he did like her. But he's never done something like that, or dated anyone. The only ballsy person who stayed close to Kovit when they knew he was a zannie was Matt, and Matt was his friend for years.

He just knew Nita for a month, and he's already kissed her. Well, she kissed him. And then he kissed her back. Several times. His lips were tingling just thinking about it.

Kovit was definitely going to talk to Nita about that, because it was blatantly obvious that what they were feeling wasn't just platonic anymore. And it was deathly mutual.

What a way to have your first kiss, just after killing your mentor, almost killing your friend who happens to be the most annoying person on the goddamn planet and being apologized to.

... yeah, he really needed this torture session.

He wasn't sure how long he'd been in the soundproof room, but he was getting tired and his arms were aching from the constant moving. He figured he had enough, Nita would probably say otherwise for Fabricio.

Kovit smirked.

"What??" Fabricio asked, his voice thick with a spanish accent.

"Hm?" He looked down at Fabricio, still tied to his chair and looking like he was fine, despite his fingers.

"Why are you smirking!?"

"Oh, so you want answers from me but you can't answer why you ran away from home?" Kovit asked, pulling a dark expression on his face, adding to the creepiness of his smirk. Those mirror sessions really helped him look scary.

Fabricio winced at his expression. "You're a monster."

"I'm aware," He said, twirling the scalpel between his fingers, freshly cleaned of Fabricio's blood. Nita will probably want this back, with her dissection fetish.

"You think you're going to live happily ever after with her??" Fabricio asked as Kovit freshened himself up.

"I doubt it, but it'll probably be happier from this time forward. Especially once Nita sees what I've done with your hands," Kovit gave a goofy look.

"Animal." Fabricio.

"At least I don't rat out on people who helped me." He's killed Henry, who was his father figure, but he wasn't going to admit that to Fuckbricio.

Henry...

"Sleep well, Fabric," Kovit waved as he left for the door.

"My name's-"

"I know exactly what your name is." Kovit threw one last creepy smile. "I suggest you sleep tonight. Unless you want me to come back over there and take real good care of you." He shut the door, hearing absolutely nothing.

Kovit sighed, stretching as he tried to look for a clock but finding Nita instead. She was passed out on the couch, her hair sprayed all over her face and pillow. He smirked, walking over and kneeling next to her. She needed a haircut.

Gently, almost making himself like a ghost, he moved his hand over her and moved her hair aside. Groaning, Nita's eyes cracked open, her golden brown eyes spotting him.

Of course that woke up Nita, fuck.

"Hey." He said, clearing his throat awkwardly as he took his hand away. And then he saw there was a thick strand of hair across her face, so he brought his hand back to sweep it away and then he took his hand away again.

... fuck that felt awkward.

"Hey yourself," She said, an amused smile appearing as she stretched, arching her back and having her arms straightened over her head. Nita then brought her arms down and sat up, scratching her head.

God, she is so beautiful I can't look at her. How does a kiss somehow clear everything yet complicate it further??

"So, uh," He looked at the ground to pick out what questions he should start with. "Was Gold being such a pain you had to sleep here?" He asked, looking up at her to smirk.

"No, I was waiting for you actually. I didn't think you'd take so long," She said, smiling apologetically.

"Did you think I wasn't going to take advantage of the soundproof room?" He asked, standing up when his knees were starting to numb.

"Knowing you, you would. I just thought you'd get tired in an hour," She scooted to the side, gesturing for him to sit down.

"How long was I in there?" Kovit asked, sitting down next to her, still keeping a distance.

"A few hours, I'd guess," She then took out a phone, Henry's. "Almost 7 hours. Enjoyed yourself?"

"Yep. I am completely satisfied." He said, ruffling his hair a bit.

"Is he still alive?" Nita asked, raising an eyebrow.

"I don't kill accidentally," He said, winking.

"Uh huh," She said, looking through the phone.

... right, how to smoothly go into the conversation of their kiss. Maybe small talk will do?

"So, college?"

Nita didn't answer him, just stared at her phone.

"Uhh, I never took you as a regular teen," He teased. "Ignoring me for your phone is very millennial,"

"I don't think either of us are millennials," She said, chuckling but keeping her eyes on the phone. "We were both born closer to the 2000s,"

"Yeah," He frowned as he raised an eyebrow at her. "Are you ok?"

"What do you mean?"

"You haven't looked at me at all. And I know you're not that transfixed on phones," He gave her a lopsided smile, but when she looked up any sort of playfulness vanished.

The way she looked at him... it was like she was preparing for his funeral.

"What is it?" He asked, knitting his eyebrows together and making his body face her.

She stood up, taking a few deep breaths. "Nita, you're scaring me," He started, getting up from his seat.

"You need to sit down for this." She said, putting her hands on his chest and pushing him back gently. Where Nita was touching him, it felt like it was on fire, it was almost uncomfortable.

"Why?" He asked. "Just tell me what's going on,"

"Kovit." She looked him in the eyes, begging. "You really should sit down for this."

Staring at her for a few more moments, he obliged. Sitting down, Nita stood in front of him, her eyes closing shut. Her knuckles were turning white around Henry's phone, as if she wanted to throw it.

"So," She started. "This isn't going to be easy to say, but I'm just going to say it." She sighed, and looked at him. "When you were torturing Fabricio, me and Gold found out that Henry... that Henry did report you to INHUP." She then handed him the phone, the screen facing him.

Kovit stared at her, feeling his heartbeat thumping in his ears. She's joking, right?

Quickly, he snatched the phone, looking at what she wanted him to see.

It was a chain of emails between Henry and Nathan, the Family's lawyer. Kovit remembered meeting him, he was a failsafe for Henry. How could he have forgotten this!?

... Henry planned to expose him to INHUP when Kovit accepted his offer to return to the Family. He was going to use INHUP regardless to control Kovit for the rest of his life, why didn't he think?!

He could feel his heart sink as he saw the email, that INHUP responded to Nathan... and they're going to review everything and in a week will expose him.

Fucking Nathan, fucking Henry, fucking fuck fuck FUCK.

This was all a set up... right from the beginning. It was planned to destroy Kovit's life, and make sure he never leaves the Family again while simultaneously having to succumb to every single person that Henry gives, whether Henry cared about his rules or not.

And Henry gave no shit for them.

The only problem is, Henry is dead now. So Kovit couldn't return to the Family, even if he wanted to.

Suddenly, Kovit started laughing, clutching to the phone.

"Kovit?" Nita asked, worry in her voice.

"I'm a fucking idiot." Kovit said, having his free hand ball into a fist and slam against his forehead. "Of course Henry would do this. He wanted me to stay in the Family and he wanted to control me. INHUP is the ultimate death sentence, and I have nowhere to hide."

"Kovit," Nita started, kneeling down to him. "Kovit, look at me,"

He looked at her, she seemed to jump when he did. Was he putting on a murder look? Probably, he was so used to it that he might as well use it.

"We are going to get you out of this." She said with fierce determination.

Kovit laughed again, covering his face. "No one survives INHUP's hit list, Nita. No one."

"And no one survived the Death Market and here we are." She said, pulling his hands away and cupping his face, making him look at her, the manic laughing cutting off. "I will never let anyone hurt you. Ever."

Kovit was aware that she was still speaking. But his ears fell deaf as he just looked at her. He just... wanted to look at her right now.

It felt very intimate, Nita so close to his face while holding it too. Memories of them kissing flashed before him, as if she was making him remember. He sighed, closing his eyes and he felt her warmth.

He knew she was going to drag him around, try to find a way to save him, but he knew it was hopeless. He'll be following his mother's footsteps, killed by INHUP. And he only had one week.

One week with Nita.

She was going to keep planning, from A to Z, and he knew there would be nothing left of him. And he will always love her will to fight, probably for the rest of his life, but he wasn't going to waste time hoping. He was going to waste time with her, ultimately.

"Nita." He said, stopping her from speaking. He opened his eyes to look at her, she seemed frozen and struggling to hold back. "Can you do me a favor?"

"Yes? What is it?" She asked, squeezing his face a little in anticipation.

"Answer me this; do you like me?"

Nita stayed silent as she stared into his black eyes, her hazel eyes searching. It felt almost torturous, waiting for her to answer. He knew that she had to feel something, but if she liked him would be a better confirmation than a kiss.

Well, technically two kisses. And holding each other longingly. And faces pressed against each other- wow, they were much more physical than he realized.

Jeez, he is an idiot.

Finally, Nita nodded. She pulled a hand from his cheek to wipe her face, he just noticed she was crying. "Yeah, I like you. So you can't die, ok?"

Kovit chuckled, leaning his face against the single hand she left on his face, closing his eyes momentarily. If he was going to die in a week, he might as well enjoy himself.

"Kovit?"

He opened his eyes, seeing her worry.

"Come here," He said, moving his hands to her face and cupping it.

"Wait what-" She started before he pulled her in and kissed her. He wasn't going to admit it to anyone, but he really wanted to kiss her again. There just wasn't an appropriate time to act on it.

Nita was tense against him at first, before she melted into him and held him. Her hands were cupping his neck, almost as if she was planning to strangle him. The blood beneath Kovit's skin was boiling where she touched, and he pulled her in closer against him.

He wanted more of this, to actually feel like a normal human being. While he loved being a zannie, he also missed out of regular, human experiences. He wasn't allowed to touch anyone in a romantic sense, much less kiss them. He's only ever had friends.

And Nita felt so much more than that.

Then she suddenly got up, separating their lips as she grabbed onto his shoulders, breathing heavily.

"Well," Nita said, clearing her throat as her face flushed deeply. "I didn't expect that,"

"That I'd kiss you?" He asked, raising an eyebrow as she sat next to him.

"I don't know," She said, shrugging as she looked at the floor. "I never done any of this,"

"Me neither,"

"Really?"

He gave her a look.

"Oh. Yeah. That." She said, pulling at her collar as she cleared her throat again.

"Do you want to try this?" He asked, raising an eyebrow?   
  


"I do, but... we have bigger matters to discuss." She said, looking at him fully. "We have to get you out of INHUP's list,"

"Why not both?" He asked, giving her a smirk. "I mean, I'm not going away anytime soon. Unless INHUP puts me on the list and I get killed in a week, but you know." He shrugged.

"How can you be so casual about this?" She asked, genuine confusion came across her.

"Because no matter what, I would've been found out. I'm a zannie, that's not exactly the easiest thing to hide," He said.

"You really do have a fatalist point of view." Nita said, sighing as she slouched down and rest her elbows on her thighs.

"You already knew that," Kovit said, tilting his head to the side.

"I talked to Adair about the list. And you." She said, frowning. "Right before the police came in. He knew why the list is the way it is, you shaped your whole life around it."

"You talked to him after I left?" He asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Well yeah." Her face dropped a little. "I didn't really have anywhere else to go after you left with Henry."

It was silent between them as they looked back. It felt so long ago that he left, when it was just a few hours.

"The police came to Adair's shop?" Kovit asked when his thoughts fully processed what she said.

"Yeah." Nita said, chuckling nervously. "So someone saw me, and called the police. They interrogated me for everything I did, with Gold chasing me with a gun, the Death Market blowing up, even with the kidnapping. I would've been busted if my mom didn't come and get me out of it." She frowned. "Of course she gets me out of everything."

"Wow. She sounds cool." He said, trying to smile. Now he felt really guilty for leaving her. If her mom didn't come, what would've happened to her? He would've just walked into an empty bedroom.

Or Henry there, just being really creepy with the whole hand on the bedsheets thing. Kovit shivered at the memory.

"Are you ok?" She asked.

"I'm fine. Just remembering something." He said, frowning.

"My mom's... scary." She said, smiling. I don't think you'll be meeting her anytime soon, she might kill you and sell you online."

"Heh. Sounds familiar." He said.

"Why did you come back?" She asked, squinting her eyes at him.

Kovit leaned back on the couch and sighed. "Because I didn't want us to end like that. I never really lost a friend through choice, and I felt... guilty. Leaving like that."

"It's understandable why you did. You were being blackmailed, and I wasn't really being a good friend." She said, turning her body to face him more.

"Well yeah." He said, flashing a smirk at her. "But it wasn't easy. Even if you saw me as a monster you couldn't stand, I wouldn't have left you. I just thought it would've been better if I did go. For you. And for me, so I didn't end up getting reported to INHUP, but that happened anyway."

Nita buried her face in her hands momentarily, before saying "I never wanted you to go."

"I know. Well, I know now." He sighed again, laying his head on the couch and looking up at the ceiling.

"What did you do after you left?" Nita asked.

"Tortured people Henry brought. I thought I would've felt better after a meal, but I didn't."

After another pause of silence, he felt a hard thing rest against his shoulder and chest, and he looked down to see Nita laying her head on him. His heart started racing as he wrapped his arm around her, pulling her closer into him.

"I'm assuming we're stuck on the couch, since Gold doesn't seem very comfortable with us."

"She's not comfortable with you." Nita said. "She's ok with me."

"So you're gonna sleep with Gold?" He asked, raising an eyebrow at her.

"... nah." She said, snuggling up to him. "Though I don't think this couch is very big."

"I mean-" He cut himself off quickly.

"What?" She lifted her head off of him to look at him.

"I was gonna suggest you sleep on me, since you already do that." He said, throwing her a teasing look.

"I will sleep with Gold if you don't cut it out." Nita said, her face flushing hard.

"What did I do??" Kovit asked, laughing.

"You know what you did." She said, blushing even harder. When she wasn't on a murder rampage, Nita was really cute.

Kovit just laughed, covering his face. "God, you are just..."

"Just what?" Nita asked, he looked at her and saw she was crossing her arms.

"Amazing." He said, smiling as he fell into his internet lingo. "You are absolutely amazing and terrifying and I want to kiss you until your face falls off."

"Ah-!" Nita's jaw dropped and she was frozen in mid-scream, staring in utter shock at Kovit.

He laughed more. "I'm kidding!" He said, trying to calm himself down. Kovit should probably be more conservative about what he says to Nita.

"Your humor is as bad as Adair's sometimes," Nita said, still extremely flustered.

"Hey." He said, his humor dropping dramatically as he looked to scold her. "It is not. And I'm far better looking."

"You are." She said, smirking. "Especially since I saw how he actually looks." She shivered at the memory.

"What did he look like?" Kovit asked, raising an eyebrow. In all his time knowing him, Kovit never actually knew what Adair looked like.

"... I'll describe it later." She said, looking at his face.

"Why later?"

"Because I want to kiss you."

"Wait what-" He was immediately silenced when Nita pressed her lips against his. It was long before he pulled her in again, holding her waist against him as she had her hands pressed on his shoulders, closing his eyes.

Kovit's heart was racing, as if it's gonna rip out of his chest and run around like the Tasmanian Devil. He wondered if Nita could feel it from his shoulders, it certainly felt visible because he could feel his own wrists pulsing.

Really, everything felt like it was pulsing, and heat was emanating everywhere.

He felt Nita shifting, and soon felt her knee between his knees as she somewhat straddles his one leg. With trembling hands, Kovit slid them up Nita's back and incidentally made her shiver. He had his one hand combed through her wild curls and his free one cupping her face as he felt her tongue slip between his lips smoothly.

He was trying to comb through her hair gently, but there were some tangles so he just held the back of her head gently, feeling how warm her head was.

Nita pulled away slightly, her forehead still against his, before returning back with full force. Kovit molded his lips against hers, and suddenly everything that was touching him felt like he was being cooked alive.

And he didn't mind it one bit.

It was getting harder to breathe, Kovit was letting out shaken breaths between their kisses. He was becoming increasingly aware of Nita's grip tightening on his shoulders.

"Ow," Kovit breathed in between the kiss when he felt claws dig into his shoulders.

"Sorry." Nita said, he opened his eyes and saw her face flushing, she pulled away a bit but her face was still so close. "I don't really know what to do with my hands." She said, chuckling nervously.

"You can put your hands anywhere." He said, Nita doing a double take. Realizing what he said, he cleared his throat. "Wait, I mean- not like  _ that _ , I mean. I just- I- fuck." He pulled his hand away from her face to cover his.

"This is so embarrassing," Nita said, coughing a laugh.

"Yeah." Kovit said, chuckling as well as he peaked between his fingers to look at her.

"Are we going too fast?" Nita asked.

"I don't know." Kovit said.

"I don't know anything." Nita said, covering her face.

"No wait, don't say that." Kovit said, frowning and pulling Nita into a hug. "It's ok."

She snuggled her head against his shoulder, hugging him back conservatively. Nita was not a hugger, but she seemed like a kisser.

"I just want you to be ok." Nita said, sighing.

"I know." He said, patting her hair gently. "I know." Kovit then pulled himself away a bit to kiss her forehead.

"Ew, get a room." Said a new voice, and Kovit and Nita turned to see Gold - May - on crutches.

"There is a room, you took it." Kovit snidely remarked.

"And the other one is occupied by Fabricio." Nita said, shrugging.

Oh boy, if Gold - May - saw them earlier she probably would've screamed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **oh boy, this took me some time to write because of how tension-y this was XD** I hope y'all enjoyed this ^^


	3. OAR Chapter 21

Kovit hated knowing he was feeling Nita's pain. While she wasn't badly hurt, she was still injured enough to considerably make Kovit tense. While he could control the shivering, it didn't mean it was the most normal thing for someone to do, like he was in pain.

And technically, he was in pain. Just not the way most humans would think.

Finally, for what seemed to be forever, Nita healed up her pains and aches. Finally, he could relax.

Nita didn't comment on it, she just started stretching her limbs, observing them almost. That made Kovit look down at himself, seeing he was covered in dried blood. Augh, did the dude have to vomit blood on _him_? He doesn't have an endless wardrobe of shirts and sweaters.

"I'm gonna wash the blood off." He said, sitting up.

"Blood?" Nita asked, then noticed he was very covered in blood. Blinking, she continued. "Wow. Yeah. Go wash."

Alright mom, Kovit sarcastically said in his mind. Not that he was gonna say that to her, that might confuse her. He got off the bed and went to the bathroom, locking the door behind him.

He peeled off his clothes, luckily his pants weren't too bad but he should still wash them too. The blood soaked through his shirt, his skin looked like some kid dropped a cup with red watercolors on him.

It looked kinda cool. The smell was horrible though. He didn't realize how bad mouth blood could stink. He grimaced, hoping that tongue dude brushed his teeth a lot before he died.

Showering while washing his clothes had become a new normal for him. Since his time at the Death Market, he's had to multitask those two while making sure he didn't slip and broke something in the toilet.

It was fucking freezing, and it was a headache more than anything, but it was managable. And he only stayed there for a month.

And then Nita blew it up.

Scrubbing dried off blood on his sweater took a bit of effort, since he didn't have a brush and he wasn't touching the toothbrushes, but he got it off. He eventually got everything washed, and he hung them over the shower curtain rod.

Eventually, Kovit rinses off the last of the blood, grabbing some body wash to try and clean off the scent. It'll at least mask it, even if he smells like... flowers. Why does Adair use women's body wash?

Oh, wait, Diana used this place for a little bit. That makes more sense. Why is he suddenly an idiot?

Speaking of idiot, now that he has washed his clothes, he has nothing to wear besides his boxers. Sleuthing around the bathroom helped, because he found some extra clothes in the cabinet under the sink. Adair must've left some here for Diana to burrow.

Or he just snuck in while Kovit and Nita were sleeping. He could see Adair doing that.

After getting dressed, he unlocked the door and left, ruffling his wet hair a bit. Nita seemed like she was disturbed, like a ghost just walked by her and she was suffering the consequences of knowing it walked in.

"Something up?" He asked, raising an eyebrow.

She shook her head, loosening her expression into a more bothered look. "No, nothing. Can you see if there's mouthwash in the bathroom?"

"Mouthwash?"

"My mouth tastes disgusting." She said, pouting a bit.

"Water?" He suggested.

"Hasn't helped." She said, slightly moving her chin side to side. He kept staring at her, waiting for her to explain why exactly she was asking for mouthwash. Did she eat something with a bad aftertaste? He didn't remember what she ate.

When did they last eat again?

Nita eventually spoke. "Gold caught me earlier and bound my hands. I spat stomach acid on her so she'd release me."

"You barfed on her?" Kovit asked, trying to keep himself from laughing so he could listen to her explanation.

"No." She said, scowling. "Concentrated stomach acid isn't the same-"

"You **_barfed_ **on her." Kovit said, losing control of his lungs as he smiled wide, teeth and all.

Nita was definitely annoyed but gave up. "Sure. Yes. Whatever." She said, rolling her eyes as though she were dealing with an immature child.

She fucking barfed on Gold- Kovit couldn't hold it in, he started laughing hard. He had to hold his stomach as it cramped from how hard he was laughing.

"I don't see why it's so funny." Nita said, and he looked at her more clearly to see her smiling.

He couldn't talk, his lungs and stomach were on fire, all he could communicate was the shaking of his head, but he wasn't even sure what he was trying to say. Kovit leaned against the wall, letting himself calm down as he looked at Nita again.

As funny as it was, it was actually really smart. He remembered one guy got bit, not from a vampire, just a regular human, and that guy was rushed to the hospital because of how many bacteria was in his mouth. Fucking sick.

Fucking deadly girl. Since when could a 17 year old scare him so much? Much less take control of this partnership? Maybe it's the fact that she's trapped him in several ways, and was just generally very, very formidable.

She was also kinda pretty. Ok she was very pretty but he wasn't going to admit that to her anytime soon.

Speaking of her, Nita's expression seemed to go through the motion. She was just smiling a moment ago, did he miss something?

Then she started crying.

"Nita, are you ok?" Kovit asked, feeling worry washing over him and moving closer to her. She sniffled, wiping her tears away.

"I'm fine," She said, her voice so low he barely heard it.

"It's clearly not." He said, pulling his eyebrows together tighter.

It was all very sudden when she crawled up to him and pressed against his body, and he instantly wrapped his arms around her as she cried into him. Nita clung to his shirt, as though she was scared he was gonna pull away.

... did he upset her with the barf comment? Did he do something?? Fuck, he's never had to do this in person. Whenever his online friends had a problem he'd always try and help, sometimes wishing he could hug them for more comfort.

This just seemed out of the blue, whatever Nita was upset about.

He'll worry about it later, Nita just needed a hug. Kovit held her close, her shoulders shaking slightly. He felt a little guilty, he probably didn't feel very dry to her right now, and he could see some droplets falling in her hair.

Kovit wasn't sure how long he held Nita, the seconds passed like hours, but eventually Nita seemed to calm down, breathing gently against him.

Carefully, he placed a hand on her shoulder, catching her attention. "What's wrong?"

"I'm fine," She said, her voice still weak and breaking.

He raised an eyebrow at her. "Really Nita? That's the story you're going for?" He asked, gesturing her face to get the point across.

She snorted, shaking her head slightly.

"You wanna talk about it?" He asked, attempting to rub her shoulder but finding that action too awkward for him to do. Nita didn't seem to notice, because she began to talk.

"My father." It seemed to take her a moment to collect herself more to explain. "I found out when I was in INHUP. He was murdered."

Kovit didn't think, he just slipped his hand into hers, holding it tightly. Who could've done this? Why did this happen?? So many things were rushing into Kovit's head all at once that he barely noticed how close Nita's face was when she finally faced him.

As soon as he did, his mind went blank to focus on his concern for her. "I'm so sorry, Nita." He said, his voice barely above a whisper. "Do they know who murdered him?"

Nita nodded, he could feel her breathing. "You remember the vampire that came to see me in the market? The one with the zebra-striped hair?"

"Him?" He asked, frowning. "Why?"

"I don't know," She said, sighing. Maybe she should brush her teeth, the stomach acid thing was apparent. "I thought maybe he was working for Fabricio's dad? Getting vengeance for his son?"

"That doesn't make sense." Kovit said, shaking his head. "If he were working with Fabricio's dad, why would Reyes have refused to let him talk to you? I know Reyes worked with Tacunan, and you said Fabricio sold you to her. It doesn't make sense."

Nita seemed to go through a few thoughts and emotions before settling on just a frown. "So, you think Zebra stripes isn't connected to Tacunan? But the timing-"

"The timing is weird. Why did your mother kidnap Fabricio?"

"I still don't know." Nita said, shaking her head.

"Maybe they're connected. The same thing that made your mother lash out at Tacunan made Zebra stripes go after your father."

"Those seem like very different consequences." Nita said, frowning a bit deeper.

"We're missing information." He said, shrugging. "We need to know how it started. It's like walking in on the middle of a movie." Kovit paused to think of a movie example he could use, and randomly landed on The Hunger Games. Did Nita see those movies? "You're seeing Katniss bury a girl in flowers, and you're seeing an old man rubbing his beard gleefully, but without knowing what The Hunger Games is, or the premise of the movie, just seeing those two scenes side by side makes it seem like total nonsense."

"You're right." Nita said, nodding hesitantly. He couldn't help but feel some pride, he rarely got told he was right. "We need to figure out the rest of the story." She finished with a shaky breath.

Kovit squeezed her hand gently, trying to comfort her more. His thoughts were appropriate to say aloud for her. "And someday, we'll find Zebra stripes and we'll slaughter him." He didn't realize how much edge he had in his voice until he finished his sentence.

And then realized he was actually pretty pissed. How many of his friends had to deal with shit like this? Nita had to deal with this and didn't even tell him until she had a breakdown. How dare anyone do this to her, to her family??

"Yes. We will." Despite her voice still recovering from crying, it was hard and strong.

"It won't make the pain go away. Not all of it. I know." He said, remembering his own lack of parents. "But I promise you, it'll be alright. Maybe not today, maybe not tomorrow. But it _will_ be alright eventually." He stroked her hand with his thumb, being as present as a ghost.

Nita's didn't say anything, she just closed her eyes and leaned her head against his shoulder. He kept his arm around her, squeezing her hand once more. She squeezed back, signaling she was still present and with him.

She was still with him.


End file.
